April 2009
23 posts
first tweet
putting the kid in the tub. in a good way.
8:16 PM Sep 13th, 2007 via my tweet 16
“Sometimes I look at the line-up of people who have FAVRD a certain tweet and...”
– nictate
50 Yards of Soul - Whitefield Brothers
Welcoming...
Console your kid who is crying because the dog took his crayon. Forcibly remove said crayon and crayon bits from the dog’s mouth. Kick dog. Console kid #2 who is crying for some other reason. Make hamburger patties. Yell at kid #1 to stop kicking the dog. Put hamburger patties on grill. Console kid #2 who is crying for yet another reason. Put finished burgers on plate. Go to sit down on...
What Does Your Tumblr Name Mean?
balut:
<snip>
The title of my Tumblr, “Dust and the Residue of the Original Contents” is a fragment of a quote by Samuel Beckett. I’m bullshitting you. It’s really from the sign on the bottle and can return machines at a nearby supermarket.
My Tumblr title is from one of the best pieces of film dialogue ever. It alludes to words’ power to illuminate, confuse, wreak havoc, have...
You ever have that thing happen where you’re meeting a buddy you haven’t seen in a while and he goes to shake your hand, but you give him the awkward man hug, except you squeeze a little too tight and break the sunglasses in his shirt pocket (you both hear them snap), and in an effort to make it up to him and since you’re so close in anyway you give him two quick euro-kisses on...
“Being totally serious for a minute: this is an amazing community, and I love you...”
– dwineman. amen, brother.
Put It On The Short Stuff*
Rocking my mullet drinking Absolut Sunkist Wishing I could fondle the chin of Verne Lundquist Putting more Funyuns on the meat of my hoagie Got to find the matches to spark my double bogey Put it on the short stuff – ask it to sit - get in the hole – take it home, take it home [repeat] [2nd verse with vocorder and theremin] Out of Amen Corner I see you coming on back Showing off that fly...
Always On My Mind Grapes
I grew up at 160 Riverside Drive, 88th st, in Manhattan, NYC. Seriously. We lived on the 8th floor. Beautiful beautiful part of the city.
Somehow, that is where @tinafey decided Liz Lemon lives. Every time I see that green awning on 30 Rock, my heart flutters. Sights, sounds and smells of that place rush back. I’m suddenly six.
I didn’t think I could have a bigger crush on this Tina...
“With all the calories I saved from not eating that pain chocolat, I was able to...”
– Moltz I laugh every single time I read this or think about it.
The "Son of Sam"
Every time I give my son a ride on my shoulders - as parents are wont to do with small children - he rips a fart and laughs.
Given the placement of the parties involved, the recipient (me) can’t do much except grin and bear it.
It is pretty diabolical.
As far as I know, this clever evil act does not have a name, in the spirt of comparable acts such as the Wet Willie or Dutch Oven. (Does...
“El Matador”, Vince & Bola, Vince...
