December 2010
8 posts
Shine
I was shaving in the bathroom, looking in the mirror, and for a moment it seemed like the reflection of my hand holding the blade was moving slower than my actual hand.
The moment repeated itself - as my hand moved the blade up my neck, the hand in the mirror stopped completely. I looked in my reflection’s eyes, and my reflection blinked when I did not.
“Close your mouth, your breath...
You ever swab the inside of your ear with a Q-tip, but the man inside your brain grabs the Q-tip and tries to pull it inside your head, and you pull back but he won’t let go, and you pull harder with both hands but he won’t let go, and you toss your body around the room trying to dislodge his grip, but no matter how loudly you grunt or how many things you knock over or how hard you...
Electric
At Christmas my stepfather would hang condoms on the mantle for our stockings. It was part of his sick sense of humor, but it also benefited him since they could only hold one or two small gifts.
On Christmas morning my sisters and I would open our condoms as my stepfather and mother sat on the couch, the room cold with disappointment. We’d feign excitement at our gifts: a tube of used...
There’s an old lady on our street who ‘walks’ her dog’s corpse.
The dead dog is collared and leashed and she pulls it along behind her. She walks most mornings, looking up at the sky, muttering things to herself and to the dead dog, whom she calls Freddy.
‘It is most certainly better without those bees, isn’t that right, Freddy?’ she said as I passed...
I can’t wait to be chopped down, strapped to a minivan, arranged in the corner of an apartment and have popcorn strung upon me as I starve to death, thought the tree. That sounds festive.
